Any mother who has uttered words such as "Cherish every moment" or "Every moment is a precious gift" has never parented a two-year-old . . . .
There . . . I said it! There are moments in the life of my two-year-old when I just wish I could fast forward through this stage or have one of those great little zappers that erase memories like in Men in Black.
It is 8AM. I have been told "NO!!" regarding a diaper change. I have had tears because breakfast was not prepared fast enough. I have endured tears and screaming because he didn't get as much donut as he wanted. I was told that he did not want fruit with his breakfast, but then received more screaming and tears when there was no fruit on his plate when it arrived to him at the kitchen table. He has screamed, "I want to sit in the BIG chair!" when told to go to the table to eat. I have picked up his milk cup from the floor repeatedly after it has been thrown across the kitchen in anger (not by me, mind you). And this has all occurred in the course of 45 minutes.
Which of these moments should I cherish? I'd like to forget them all, but instead I record them for the entertainment of my friends and family.
The scene above will repeat itself at least a dozen times today. I will feel like a horrible mother because I will want SO much to remind him that he is two, and I am the mom who labored for 26 hours to bring him into this world. Therefore, I get to be the boss!
I know that my sweet, funny, wonderful little boy will return to me at some times during the day. Tonight I will read him his favorite bedtime story. He will repeat in a sweet little voice his favorite phrases from the book. I'll kiss him goodnight and tell him that I love him. When I get downstairs it will occur to me that I miss him.
Mothering a two-year-old has got to be the most insane thing. It's an emotional roller coaster. It's exhausting a lot of the time, both physically and emotionally. It's frustrating and often confusing. I never know if I'm doing the "right thing" or if I am ruining my child for the rest of his life. It is the truest test of patience and tolerance.
For those of you think that I am going to end this with something like "but it is so wonderful and rewarding" . . . WRONG. I'm being honest . . . much of the time it SUCKS. However, I don't love my little guy any less for it. I just hold tight to the hope that 3's are easier. Heck, by then I'll be coming up on another round of 2's. Yea!
Uh oh . . . gotta go. He wants more fruit.
4 comments:
OH MY GOD! i couldn't have said it better myself! just yesterday we had a meltdown when we were trying to get out the door to go to the airshow (that we knew he would love) because he HAD to put on his shoes and socks my himself! he is getting better at this task since he ALWAYS wants to do it by himself but it still takes FOREVER! no way mom and dad could even think of helping him! hang in there and you are NOT a bad mother! sam has been an angel this morning but i know that one little wrong move by me can send him spinning into a whirlwind! i'm here for ya' sister!
Wow. You definitely have a way of putting it!! Parenting is a roller coaster and once you are on, the only thing you can do is hold on tight and enjoy the ride. And I hate to burst any bubbles, but we have (almost) three-year-old meltdowns and five-year-old meltdowns on a daily basis here. The fits definitely do not go away, but instead change in intensity. I think we all question ourselves but that makes us better moms for it. Hang in there!!!!
I know it sounds crazy, but I am THANKFUL when I experience some of those trials with Sadie. So try to look at it in a different light. Believe me, I agree 100% with all that you have expressed, but when you are not sure what your child will be able to do as they are growing and learning, your perspective on behavior changes. But your exact scenario has happened time and time again with both of mine, and yes I also doubt myself at times, wondering if I am a good mommy, but what you have to remember is that Gabriel and Grace HAVE a mommy, a loving mommy, that is there for them and cares for them, and that right there is a gift in its self. This time goes by so fast that soon we will all look back at these days as parents and "miss" them.
Proverbs 29:15
Hebrews 12:11
... denise,, i'm going to have to "unsubscribe" to your blog if you keep scaring me like this :) ahahah
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